Life has its ups and downs. This is a fact. Each one of us has experienced this fact. Unforeseen developments both at work and at home can be devastating for anybody. Losing a parent or a dear one, losing a job, health problems,spouse issues, family issues, financial crunch …the list is endless. And If the time is too unkind then many of us may find us grappling with multiple of these issues at the same time. Hard times can hit us at any time…even at times when things seem to be going great for us. What to do! As I said earlier, Life has it’s ups and downs…!
During your hard times you might have to face insults and face humiliations. There would be a feeling of hopelessness, feeling of being extremely alone and being lonely. It’s a fact that during hard times, your friends and relatives, whom you trusted so much would suddenly distance themselves. Some of them would even take this opportunity to hit back at you knowingly that you are facing hard times.
Well, well…life is like that! You never know who would behave in what manner when you go through hard times. It’s better that you be prepared or at least prepare to face the hard times without getting too much affected. Also, you need to workout a plan to get out of the hard times at the earliest.
Now the question arises ‘How to deal with hard times?’…especially when you are almost down and out, emotionally drained, mentally disturbed and what not! Be calm and patient.There is only one way to deal with it- Fight it out! Yes, don’t just sit and bear the pain but be strong enough and fight with grit and determination. This is the time to re-shape your destiny. And remember one thing- it’s your battle and only you will be fighting it out, nobody else would do it for you.
And how should one fight the hard times? Not an easy job but believe me, very much doable. I list down some of the doable things that you need to incorporate in your day to day living. Be honest and sincere with these action points and I am sure you would see and feel the change yourself. So, with all calmness and attention, go through each point and see what action plan you can make for yourself. All the best!
1. Routine
This is the most important thing to remember when you are facing any kind of adversity. You need to have a fix and meaningful routine each day. Ensure that you are following this routine without fail and are not lost. Don’t just wander aimlessly. Don’t just waste your time. The point I am trying to make here is that you should be able to feel worthy of yourself. When we are engaged in physical and mental activities, we don’t waste time thinking too much about our problems. We become more constructive in our thoughts and seek solutions to our problems. Remember what our grandparents used to say- An empty mind is a devil’s workshop! So, follow a meaningful routine whether you are at work or at home.
2. Health
Try to maintain a good health. You might be having specific health issues but still ensure you are taking care of yourself. Healthy and timely eating habits pave way for a happy and healthy life in the long run. Don’t let your ‘mood’ decide your menu. And don’t skip meals. At the same time, ensure that you are engaged in some sort of physical activity in your daily routine. If nothing works out, just ensure to walk for at least twenty minutes. If you are restricted in your physical movements, ensure you do basic breathing exercise like Pranayaam. It will help you immensely in your overall well being- both physically and mentally.
3. Acquire Knowledge
Adversity or no adversity – never stop the learning process! This will help you to keep away the negative thoughts and will give you a sense of achievement. You can also enroll yourself in some course which you think would add value to you. It can be an online course or a classroom course. Also, do some reading every day. It helps. I have found some books very helpful to me and I can recommend few of them for you here:-
These books are Bible of our lives. They not only teach us how we can lead a purposeful life but also how to achieve our goals. Knowledge never goes waste. It will not only make you feel empowered.
4. Networking/Friends
Never try to avoid people during this phase i.e. when facing hard times. Whatever be your situation, maintain a positive stance and be bold enough to accept the situation. The more you try to avoid people, the more they will try to intrude in your life. You face them boldly and they will be on their own. Try to build a support group. Say, one or two persons with whom you can be comfortable. They can be among your close friends, colleagues or family members. I found great comfort in talking to my seniors and mentors.
Whenever you feel down, try to reach out to them and share a bit of what you are going through. Remember, no self-pity here. World does not like people who either complain or are in a self-pity mode. You are not seeking sympathy…you are seeking support to lighten your pain. Just a word of caution here- don’t narrate your sorrow to each and every person you meet in your network! So, the bottom line is – don’t avoid people and continue to maintain your friendly relations with your friends and colleagues.
5. Up-to-date with current affairs
Keep a tab on the current affairs. Be informed about what’s happening around you. Read Newspaper daily. You will come across many news items that might act as an opportunity for you. Being informed always helps. The world is a happening place with new opportunities coming up every day. You just need to be aware of such opportunities to grab your share of the pie.
6. Family
Family is important. Unfortunately, when people hit rough patch, the first thing they try to do is to make themselves aloof from their family. This is not correct. Seek support and make them understand. Tell them about your problem you are facing and share your plan of action. I am sure they would understand and help you to cope with the hard times.
But it might also be possible that you don’t get the required support from your family. What to do in such a scenario? Well, as I said earlier, reach out to your support groups. They can act as family members. The crux of the matter is- seek support and company. It will help you fight the hard times with greater power.
7. No Drugs/Alcohol
When one goes through hard times one may fall into the trap of getting into intoxication like using drugs and consuming alcohol. This would apply more to those who already are in the habit of taking alcohol within limits (consuming alcohol once or twice a week) either as a social drinker or as a regular drinker. Some of you might take to smoking as well. This is not right approach. These bad habits would further create problems and you will never be able to come out of your hard times. Never indulge in these habits. Be careful about your company. Seek medical help if required.
8. Self-Time/Meditation
Try to find some ‘me-time’ every day- any time when you could be just yourself. Close your eyes and do little talking with yourself. Be honest during this time. In your thoughts review your activities and your life style and see if any betterment can be achieved. Review your progress. Ask yourself ‘Am I doing all that is needed?’ ‘What more can I do?’
You can do it immediately after your bath or may be in the night time before retiring to bed. It’s totally up to you to find an appropriate time for yourself.
9. Pray
Nothing can replace a prayer coming straight from the heart! Believe me! Yes, one never knows the power of prayer. Make it simple, straight from the heart affair! Just bow down and surrender yourself completely to the almighty. No ego here. Howsoever difficult the hard times may be, howsoever difficult the struggle may be…always pray and thank God! Power of the universe is immense. And your prayer will never go waste! Believe me! Pray with all honesty and all heart! Not as a ritual or a routine. It’s your time with God! Make use of every second!
10. Good sleep
Have a sound sleep every day. Try to go to bed early. Have your meals in time. Six to seven hours sleep every day is essential. Never sleep during the day if you are at home. When you retire to bed, be calm and just blank your mind. Before doing that, have a quick stock taking about the next day’s plan and activities. Retire with a sense of gratitude to the almighty and fall asleep! Make sure you have sweet dreams!
Last word:-Never lose humour
One last word! …never lose your sense of humour! Incorporate humour in all walks of your life. You would see that life is not that tough! It’s just a matter of time when the bad times changing into good times again! Smile, humour, laughter etc. make hard times more bearable and less bitter. Is it that difficult to incorporate a little humour and occasional laughter in our lives? Bad times or no bad times….ensure you smile as much as you can and never miss an opportunity to have a hearty laughter! Remember the song’ Jindagi….hasne gaane ke liye hai pal do pal’ (‘Life is too short to laugh and sing for a moment or two…’)
Wishing you Great times ahead!
Cheers!